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Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
heyaa darlins.i went raya shoppin wif daddy! papa! juz him n me! first tym ever. last nyt. it was oh soo sooo fun! jln jln thr. nth fascinatin as ive mentioned b4. it was a happy tym spent i must say. bt then a silent truth hit me soo hard sudenly e happiness is nt soo ful of happiness animore. i saw e crack. as in. hw do i put it. i love papa. n i love mama too. no thrs no problems as of now. hopefully none.bt im embracing my self. bt yeah i realised whr n wd went rong. n wd he is doin n wd hes not doin. mebe im juz imagining things. bt hey. im juz being me ryt wd is love? no seriously? pls go shut up abt all e its forever.. n u noe i was watchin e malay drama "rahsia perkawihnan" if tt e correct spellin. secrets of marriage. like. im watchin e exact happening in my hse on tele. juz tt e actors are nt the members of my family. i dunnoe y im tearin now. dun ask me. im too confused to noe y. bt u noe like. done is done. bt y. i alwys haf this qn. WHY. WHY. i love papa ok. he loves me too. he loves all of us. no doubt. i. i dunnoe wd to say. im juz not happy. my mind is not at peace. i duwan ani of this to happen. no one is perfect. no one is perfect. no one is perfect. all i ask for is a happy family. its not happenin. nth is happenin. life is a pile of shit. even in ramadan. ryt now. i miss fadie. lots. i wanna meet fadie i wanna run go hug her. n drink up coffee at starbucks. temptin. yeaps. nyts. ppl say cryin helps. niopes. nt helpin in aniway. |
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